Insane Video Of Somali Pirates Getting Swiss Cheesed While Attempting To Commandeer An American Ship

Gotta be honest, I don't know how old this video is but I don't really care. This shit is awesome. I know we probably shouldn't like pirates but yo ho yo ho a pirates life is indeed pretty fucking insane. Think about this scene for a minute. You are chilling in an enormous ship. Usually, the sides of the boat- whether it be port or starboard side- will be wrapped in razor wire, you have automatic weapons with calibers anywhere from 5.56 all the way up to the Oerlikon 20 mm cannon just ready, willing, and most importantly able to reach out and touch you from a long distance. 

What do you get for pirating a ship like that? Do they ever get away with it? I dunno and I'll never research it but I did read a book about it once. The book was called the Desert and the Sea: 977 Days Captive on the Somali Pirate Coast. 

In the book, the author describes how his ordeal began just after he dropped off a colleague at a small airport in Somalia. As he was heading back into town, his car came upon a truck full of armed men.

"The 12-or-so gunmen on the back came off the flatbed and around to my side of the car and pulled me out," he says. "They bloodied me, they broke my glasses, they broke my wrist, and they piled me into another waiting SUV and drove me off to the Somali bush. 

That was the beginning of an imprisonment that spanned two years and eight months. Moore was kept in huts, and on a hijacked tuna fishing boat full of other hostages.

He got to know his captors. He made friends with fellow prisoners. And he kept turning over one line in his head — something a pirate said in the earliest days of his captivity.

" 'You have made a mistake,' he said," Moore says. "He said, 'Mistakes are human.' And it was an insulting thing to say, because there he was in a position to make something off my ransom, and he's telling me that I made some sort of a mistake as if I had made a wrong move within Somalia, as if I'd done something to cross the gang. He was trying to make me feel guilty. But of course that echoed in my mind for the rest of my time, 'cause I made a very big mistake, you know? I not only went to Somalia — I got captured. And that weighed on me for the entire 2 1/2 years, obviously."

After reading that book and other accounts, I would absolutely arm my ship to the teeth and be delivering warning shots, actual shots, and everything in between. As the old saying goes, Pirates seem cool when it's a drunken Johnny Deep or Dustin Hoffman playing the character. When it's actual pirates coming to be the captain now, well, that's something that I simply cannot abide. 

When it comes to pirates on the open seas, in the worlds of every firing range in the history of my beloved Marine Corps, you may commence firing when your targets appear. TARGETS!

Anyway, here's my favorite song about pirates.