*Climbs The Nation’s Highest Mountain Peak, Cups Hands Together Over My Mouth And Whispers As Loudly As A Scream* The McRib Is Back

Finally, our long national nightmare is about to be gently awaken to end our stomach’s slumber through a period that didn’t allow for any REM rest. If you thought the Popeyes lines were long- if you thought that voting lines were terrible- if you thought Josh Hamilton dealt with long lines (huge Six Flags Fan)- just wait until that barbecue sauce-slathered meat flank fills a non-perishable hoagie roll with a kiss of pickle and onion. 

Eight years. Eight whole years. If a sense truly does make the heart grow fonder, my heart has become as fond as Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny Devito in the hot movie Twins. In this wonderful movie, Julius and Vincent Benedict are twins, the result of a secret experiment carried out at a genetics laboratory to combine the DNA of six fathers to produce the perfect child. To the surprise of the scientists, the embryo split and the twins were born. The mother, Mary Ann Benedict, was told that Julius died at birth, and not told about Vincent at all.

Vincent was placed in an orphanage run by nuns in Los Angeles and believed his mother abandoned him. With no one but himself to rely on, Vincent seduced a nun, escaped from the orphanage, and later became an indebted, small time criminal. Julius was raised on a South Pacific island by Professor Werner, one of the scientists from the experiment, who put him through intense physical training and extensive study. Both believed Mary Ann died during childbirth.

Each twin was unaware of the other's existence. On Julius' 35th birthday, Werner finally tells Julius about Vincent. With Werner's blessing, Julius proceeds to Los Angeles to find his brother. Julius eventually tracks Vincent down in jail, where he is being held for unpaid parking tickets and driving with an expired license.

I won’t spoil anymore of the movie but check it out with a McRib or two courtesy of your favorite food delivery service because when it comes to the McRib. Utah (my Postmates driver), get me 2.