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Don't Forget: Trevor Bauer Has THREE (3) Rules Of Dating

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Indians pitcher Trevor Bauer seems so cool that it’s hard to imagine why anyone wouldn’t like him. But in a recent interview with Sports Illustrated, the star pitcher's candor on his dating life is getting reactions from fans in the baseball world.

When the 28-year-old pitcher meets a potential romantic partner, he is clear from the beginning what he expects and what she should expect on their very first date.

“I have three rules,” Bauer told Sports Illustrated.

Yeah yeah yeah.... I know it's an old article. But it's important because it's an on the record piece that gives us a glimpse into the mind of the weirdest baseball player on earth - and I say that as a term of endearment. He's just a weird brained guy. If you've listened or read anything we do at Barstool Chicago, you'd know that we LOVE weird brained guys. But it's his weird brain that's going to be the reason teams lay off him. The article above is just one reason why. 

I also know that Trevor Bauer is more than likely NOT going to wind up playing for the Chicago White Sox in 2021, but that's fine. It's our offseason right now and the offseason is the season of perpetual hope, or at least perpetual hope until our hearts are typically broken. But I wanted to revisit this article because Trevor Bauer could be embarking on one of the most atypical free agency hat dances of all time, and for a few different reasons:

1. Organizations will try their goddamn hardest to suppress salaries for FA players this winter due to revenue losses from the pandemic and he's by FAR the best FA starting pitcher available
2. Bauer is on record as saying he'll only sign 1 year deals because he made a bet with his buddy that he'd let him shoot him in the balls with a paintball gun if he ever signed a multi-year deal:

3. He's a total wild card personality and can't possibly jive well in every clubhouse. 

Now it's been said a million times, but Trevor Bauer is an acquired taste. I know that, you know that, and Trevor Bauer himself knows that better than anyone. I happen to really like him, at least for the most part. He adds a lot of spice to the game and I have an affinity for his scientific mind. He's turned his less than "freak" physical frame into a dominant starting pitcher by using science, and I like those kinda guys. 

Sure, he does dumb shit like trolling the team that just swept his team out of the playoffs… 

and crashing drones into brand new, million dollar scoreboards and launching balls over the CF fence after surrendering a few runs…

But in the end, he stays out of trouble and like I said, is a fucking stud of a pitcher. But then the article I linked above resurfaced. His three rules of dating are as follows:

1. Don't catch feelings
2. No pics when we're in public
3. He's going to be banging other girls while he's banging you

Read the whole article. I don't wanna get Barstool sued for plagiarism, so I can't link any more of it. Just read it. But I mean… number 2 I get wholeheartedly. But number 1 and 3? I mean we've all taken part in numbers 1 and 3 before… but you just can't say that shit out loud anymore, and this is the kinda stuff that is going to scare teams off him this winter, even though he's "subtly" making his free agent case to teams as we speak on Twitter:

Let me make this loud and clear - I want the White Sox to not only go after Bauer, I want them to land Bauer. The players on the team, namely guys like Lucas Giolito and Tim Anderson do have some say in a signing like this, because he'd have to fit in in the clubhouse, but I don't want the offseason to end and to hear the White Sox were the bridesmaid and not the bride. But holy hell, shit like this keeps getting sent to me and I know in the back of my head it's going to cause the Sox to be like "nawwww…. we're good." 

Imagine Bauer starting game 3 instead of Dane Dunning. Now I think Dunning will be a very fine pitcher in this league, but it was his 8th career start and they had NO confidence in him to put them in a position to succeed. That's why he was yanked after 2/3rds of an inning. That doesn't happen with Bauer and the White Sox are more than likely playing tonight against Houston.

I still say go big or go home with him and will continue to do so until I have a reason not to, but I'm gonna need Bauer to STFU for the rest of winter. The baseball nerd vlogs are awesome, keep doing those, but stop doing the tell all interviews and troll jobs on Twitter. Just my $0.02.