I'm Gonna Be the Lebron James of "Kayak Polo" Next Summer

I was taking a stroll near Chelsea Piers yesterday when I discovered people playing some sort of ball game on Kayaks. 

Turns out the sport is called Kayak Polo 

Now I'm not going to pretend I could compete internationally. Despite what White Sox Dave thinks…


I never played water polo in college. HOWEVA, I knew how to swim by age 3 and knew how to Kayak by age 6 (NBD). As I've said ad nauseam, I'm an aquatic mammal. Thus, I bet I could dominate in the New York Water Polo league because let's face it, the only people playing are folks who desperately want to be good at sports, but having come up short in every athletic endeavor they've attempted, have resorted to playing a sport as obscure as Kayak Polo. Meanwhile, I'm a Chinese Super Bowl champion who thrives in the water. GAME OVER.

And in the off-chance the competition is a bit better than expected, I have no qualms setting my sights a bit lower and just dominating in an inter-office Kayak Polo league. I'm 100000% confident I'd at least be the best Kayak polo player at Barstool HQ. 

Here are some more Kayak polo clips which are surprisingly entertaining. Being able to goal-tend with your paddle is a game-changer.