The Barstool Sportsbook is LiveDownload and Play in PA Now

UPDATE: Scientists Now Believe They Have Figured Out Why A TON Of Elephants Across Eastern Africa Are Dropping Dead

I wrote about this story when it was first reported in July and it appears that we finally have an update on why one of the world's most lovable, majestic, and irresponsibly hunted beasts was just dropping dead as the governments in the area looked the other way. Well here it is

(The Cut)--The first is a neurotoxin in algal blooms, which would help explain why 70 percent of elephants in Botswana died near water holes, where algal blooms have been growing rapidly due to global warming and farming methods. While researchers initially ruled out bacterial toxins, as other species that frequent water holes weren’t dying at the same rate, professor Christine Gosden at the University of Liverpool believes the neurotoxin BMAA (beta-Methylamino-L-alanine) is the culprit: Not only do elephants have a proclivity for playing in water, but their long trunks also have a significant number of olfactory receptors. Also, many of the deceased elephants reportedly wandered around in circles before dying, appearing completely disoriented, which is characteristic of BMAA.

Initially the prevailing reaction was that this was the work of poachers and that the government of Botswana was at least somewhat complicit. I am happy to learn that is not the case. Just some run of the mill weird ass algal blooms caused by global warming, of course. Something...we can't possibly control so elephants are likely to continue to drop dead at an alarming rate. It is...another plague. You can chalk it up to the same reason as the Australian wild fires, coronavirus, flooding, locusts, earthquakes, American wild fires, fire tornadoes, and two hurricanes at the same time...

God is just sick of our shit. It's been that way since Moses wore short pants. Just piling up grievances like Dwight against Jim. There's been a zillion plagues this year across the world. The only thing left would be a meteor, God's favorite reset button.