Just kidding! Of course you can guess what happened next because any sane person would jump to the reasonable conclusion that if you point a gun at something, there's a good chance that something is going to get shot.
VICE - On August 11, a member of the group "Loaded Guns Pointed at [B]enis" posted a video of himself pointing a loaded 1911 handgun at his junk. There’s a brief pause before the gun discharges.
In fact, the only real surprise here is that it took this long to happen in the first place. You see, the injured gentleman is a member of "Loaded Gunes Pointed at [B]enis," a private Facebook group of men who - yup, you guessed it - posts pictures and videos of guns pointed at their penises.
Why would someone willingly point a loaded gun at their junk and seek the company of people who also treasure putting their family jewels on the line? Well, there appears to be some confusion here, but generally speaking, there are two schools of thought:
1) It's all fun and games.
VICE - “It's not about politics…It's just good, wholesome, fun.”
2) It's fun with a side of "We the Fudds, hate the Normies." "Fudds" (as in Elmer Fudd) are big-time gun nuts, and they are just about sick and tired of the way "normies" (basic gun owners) talk about guns and the importance of gun safety.
The moderator of the Facebook group “Shit Gun Normos Say,” said in a post: “Congratulating people for keeping their finger in the right place is like congratulating somebody for not wrapping their seatbelt around their neck, or for not shitting their pants in public.”
So in order to show these normies how idiotic and lame it is to preach about "keeping your finger off the trigger," the members of Loaded Guns decided to post videos of guns pointed straight at their dicks with their finger directly on the trigger to mockingly prove everyone knows how to NOT shit their pants in public.
Whoopsie. That definitely blew up in their faces. And balls.
“Hey [b]ois, I might have fucked up,” the man who shot himself in the balls wrote above a picture of his naked legs and splattered blood on the carpet of his floor. A towel is stuffed between his legs and a printed out copy of the constitution is crumpled on the edge of the photo.
Look, he may have shot his balls clear off, but at least NO ONE can accuse this man of not knowing his constitutional rights (lol who just casually keeps a printed copy of the consititution at their desk???) or being a pussy.
The guy posted through the incident as he bled. “God’s caliber [.45] went through my scrotum, mattress, boxspring, and floor,” he wrote. Originally the man thought he’d just grazed his balls, but a subsequent hospital visit told a different story…
“Turns out it wasn’t a graze, that round went right the fuck through me,” he posted. “What I thought were two graze wounds, turned out to be an entrance and exit wound.”
Well you know, you win some, you lose some.
More importantly, balls can come and go, but the friendships he's developed through Loaded Guns are forever. Most groups would have kicked you out after you disgraced their name by hurting yourself doing the one thing the group collectively does: mock safety measures. Not Loaded Guns though; they're celebrating their king.
“The reason we are calling him king is partially because the poor guy already shot himself, don’t think he needs to be chastised as well… I’m quite sure he’s learned his lesson without the entire world calling him an idiot.”
Now that's the kind of support we should all aim for.