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REPORT: Kai Havertz Is 'Pushing Hard' For A Deal That'll Send Him To Stamford Bridge As Soon As Next Week


Kai Havertz is pushing hard for Bayer Leverkusen to agree a deal with Chelsea before the Bundesliga side's Europa League match against Rangers next week.

Havertz wants to move to Chelsea and work under Frank Lampard and only an agreement about the transfer fee is holding up the deal.

Leverkusen value Havertz at £90m but all parties are hopeful a £70m deal, plus add-ons, can be done.

"Well, well, well" - Joel Gertner.

Here we are again, talking about another massive Chelsea signing. I'm not lying when I say this is easily my favorite version of Chelsea. While it was fun - and honestly quite useful - seeing what a lot of the youth product was capable of doing for the Chels, there's simply no comparison when Roman Abromovich breaks out his checkbook. 

sidenote - having been on both sides of the money spectrum (penny-pinching vs spending bag) when it comes to supporting teams, I have to say I much rather prefer the spend-all-the-money-and-actually-make-your-team-good side of that argument. Every. Single. Time.

Now, I know what you're saying…

"Ethan, it's not official yet, don't get too excited you beautiful son of a bitch"

To that I say, thank you. Really needed that compliment this Monday. Secondly, I say go fuck yourself. When reports like this are all over the place in the soccer world, chances are the transfer is happening. The same exact thing literally happened with the Werner and Ziyech deals. Chelsea and Leverkusen have been doing this odd dance with each other over Havertz for like two weeks now. It's happening. Werner, Ziyech, and now Havertz. Add that to Pulisc, Reece James, Kovacic, amongst many others and we're cooking with some serious gas. Everything coming up Chels. 

As for Havertz's decision, it's brilliant. I wouldn't want to play in a midweek Europa League game against Rangers if I was valued at almost $100m, either. Had Chelsea lost to Wolves on Sunday Havertz might be signing a different tune. Then again, this is Chelsea we're talking about. Not fucking Spurs. We don't bottle big games. They were never gonna lose that game. A massive game for their UCL life AT the Bridge? The Wolves players would've had better luck playing the fucking lottery than getting a win on Sunday. 

I'm tired of hearing United fans sucking Bruno Fernandes's dick so, hopefully, the young Alleskönner (jack of all trades) can stick a lil thunder right in that ugly fuck's ear. Seeing Bruno Fernandes smile makes me remember how much I truly hate Manchester United and everything they stand for. From the "Glory, Glory" song right down to calling their own stadium "the theatre of dreams". So fucking lame. 

Giphy Images.

Now we just pray that we can somehow convince a team to take Kepa off our hands and we'll be fine. Spend that money on some defensive reinforcements alongside a new goalkeeper and Chelsea is winning the league within the next three years. It's that simple. Super Frank is also gonna have to figure out a way to play all of his new signings as well as his current players, a spot I am NOT envious of. There are gonna be some tough decisions to come in the remainder of this transfer window for Chelsea but I have full confidence that Frank and the board will get it right. Carefree.

Welcome, Kai Havertz!

whenever the deal is officially official

PS - we're gonna batter the Gunners in the FA Cup final on Saturday. Baku all over again.

PPS - just wrote that previous PS and then this Hernan Crespo goal at Highbury blessed my timeline, enjoy.