"I Still Love Sharks!" — Woman Attacked By Shark

New York Post — A shark documentary filmmaker was bitten by one of the predators in Australia — but professed to reporters, “I still love sharks,” as she was taken away to a hospital on a stretcher for her injuries.

“I still love sharks! Sharks are beautiful!” a smiling Anika Craney shouted as she was wheeled into Cairns Hospital in Queensland following the attack, online video shows.

Now that is a level of dedication I can't imagine having to anything, let alone fucking sharks — and a shark you don't even know, at that. This wasn't her pet shark, it was just some rando in the ocean.

If one of my dogs bit me, I would forgive them because they're my dogs and I have an attachment to them. But if some random animal attacked me to the point I had to be airlifted to a hospital, I'm sure as hell not going to turn around and say how beautiful it is. That animal sucks.

And what a tough break to be attacked by a shark while filming a shark documentary. I don't mess with the ocean at all because I'm not going to wade into the terrifying sea creatures' home turf, but the false sense of confidence one must have as a shark filmmaker has to make that bite sting a little bit more.

I'm all for whatever floats your boat, but this woman has an unhealthy fascination with sharks. Take up a hobby that was not built to kill you.

And since it appears this woman will be fine and still loves sharks, I feel it's ok to accompany this story with Anthony Jeselnik's "Shark Party," one of my personal favorite stand-up comedy bits of all-time.