Amy Schumer Threw Herself At The Feet Of Kim And Kanye On A Red Carpet And Pretended To Worship Them

Everything coming up Amy Schumer, huh?  She hosted the MTV Awards, Spags just blogged her Friday Night Lights parody that’ll go viral and her Comedy Central show “Inside Amy Schumer” just got renewed for a 4th season.  And then here she is throwing herself at the feet of Kim and Kanye on the red carpet to worship them.  Chick is everywhere.  But this blog isn’t about Amy or her meteoric rise in comedy.  It’s about Kanye (like everything else) and what he was thinking in that moment.  First of all, no way he knows who Amy Schumer is or that it was a prank.  So in his head he was probably like, “Finally.  People are finally bowing to me.  I can’t believe it took this long. Do you see this coat?!”  His face doesn’t say that (his face says get this white bitch outta my way) but I’d bet a pretty penny that’s what he was thinking.  Because he’s Kanye all the time and he for sure thinks people should be worshipping him.  He thought that way before College Dropout hit the stores.

PS-  Stay with me here because its gonna get weird.  Remember when Kanye said, “A hip hop legend, I think I died in that accident cause this must be heaven” on Touch The Sky?  Well it’s getting to the point where I think that’s actually true.  Kanye died in that 2002 L.A. car accident and we’re just living in a world he dreamed up.  Call me crazy but it’s almost the only explanation for his career trajectory.  He went from a little-known producer in Chicago to a recording artist to a global super star to a music icon in about 10 years.  Oh and along the way worked alongside his idol (even made an entire album with him), sold countless records, made millions of dollars, started a fashion line, cemented his place in hip hop history and married the chick with the fattest ass.

I mean look at this.

Only the ego-driven brain of Kanye West would dream up one day having his face on the cover of TIME magazine’s World’s Most Influential People edition.  All I’m saying is none of this might be real and we all could just be characters in a play Kanye is dreaming up*.  Is that so hard to believe?

*Or he’s just an uber-talented dude with an insane work ethic and is great at what he does which is probably the case.  But come on, that’s not the fun theory