*extremely Vladimir Putin voice*
“Who in the FUCK authorize you to flip ze tank during parade?”
Russian tank driver: no one, comrade!
putin: comrade? What is this? Some American Smut blog conservation? You’ll address me as mr. President.
Driver: I believe you mean conversation, Mr. President.
Putin: that is what I said. Conservation. I did say this, no?
Driver: CON-VER-SATION. You’re saying con-servation. One means to talk or communicate. The other means to preserve.
Putin: really? I’ve been saying this conservation for years. How come nobody told me?
Driver: I believe you mean, “why didn’t anyone tell me?”
Putin: TO THE GULAG!