Want Your Wedding To Pop Off? Have The Bride Twerk On Stage Like A Bad Bitch

Now this is being pitched around Twitter as a bride twerking. I don’t know about that. The groom isn’t in a tux and everyone else is dressed like they’re heading to a movie theater at 2 o’clock on a Tuesday. But, at the same time, the bride is in a thong so who the fuck knows? I mean it does appear to be a banquet hall of some sorts. Nonetheless, such a fucking trash wedding. If I walked in and saw this shit I’d yell that I hope their marriage ends in a murder/suicide, light their wedding presents on fire, then walk out with both middle fingers in the air. Oh no, I’m talking about the bride twerking. That looks awesome. That should be a wedding staple. I’m talking about the cash registers in the background. You have a cash bar, you can get fucked and die slow. You have an open bar? You’re gonna have a happy and healthy marriage.