The Carolina Hurricanes Are Absolutely Terrified Of The NY Rangers

 

Awwwwwww, poor Hurricanes. What happened to the organization who entertained their fans with scripted cellies after every home victory & made it a point to prove they were the most fun-loving team in the league? I kinda liked those guys...

 

Now all of a sudden, with a global pandemic threatening the immediate future of their sport, they vote AGAINST the inclusion of more teams and therefore more fanbases because...it's not fair to them? Listen Canes, with that kinda attitude you never stood a chance regardless of the format. Soft as baby shit teams don't win postseasons. Hell, they don't even win a single game against 8-seeds - look no further than Tampa Bay, the other Charmin-soft squad who voted "No". Cups aren't won based on "odds" or "opponents". It's the mentality of not giving a fuck who's in front of you. The confidence that, if you play your best game, it's good enough to beat anyone.

Was it fair in 2017 when the Rangers, despite being the 5th best Eastern team, were seeded 7th because of the playoff format & had to open against a division-winner? Nope. What happened though? They whipped the Habs' ass, that's what happened.

Granted, Carolina doesn't stand a chance with the draw they've gotten. I bet they'd vote "Yes" if their opposition was any other squad but the NY Rangers. I mean the Blueshirts have dominated them in every way, shape & form recently. Not only did they sweep all four games this season and won 6 of 7, but off the ice has been no different. A pair of seconds for Adam Fox?? Tough break there. A first-rounder to unload an underachieving Brady Skjei and 4 more years at $5.25M/per? Yikes. And it's only a matter of time before we point and laugh at the Keane-for-Gauthier swap when JG is posting 25/25 seasons. You can pencil in the former Canes prospect for a GWG this series considering how things have gone for them vs NY lately.

In an alternate Covid-free universe, the Candy Canes might not have even made the playoffs at all - and if they did they'd most likely have been tangling with a powerhouse in Boston or Washington. This scenario is actually a benefit to them. They're guaranteed an invitation to the party and they're squared off against a team that was just two-points behind them in the standings and could have very reasonably leapfrogged them anyway. You were gonna have to earn your spot against squads like the Rangers one way or another, so how exactly is this not fair? Quit your crying and take your impending ass-whooping like professionals.

Bunch of jerks.