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It's Official - We're Having The Horniest May In Recorded History

Not to get overly scientific here but there's some big time comfort that comes with this wet data. A lot of people got nervous when quarantine started that society would dry up as a whole and nobody would be getting laid. And obviously your social life's hit rock bottom along with your physical and emotional health. But to know that we're getting wetter than ever is a testament to the human condition. Like how they say that retirement communities have some of the highest sexual activity rates across all human populations - it doesn't make sense at first but then you realize it's all about captivity = penetration. Seniors are wise enough to not waste time and now we're seeing rapid downstream evolution in the wake of similar circumstances for the rest of us. 

And honestly I'm enjoying it. To that end, I'm predicting the next big crisis to be a shortage of hospital beds for all the newborns coming in 2021. That's just common sense knowing that moisture levels and creampie frequency go hand-in-hand. Where we put all these babies - I have no fucking idea but we'll let the Raw Dawgs figure that out when the time comes. For now, maybe a good time to remind you guys to go to for all your sex needs and $5 off some monthly swipes. Get that dick in shape.