Robert Kraft Was At The Southie St. Patrick's Day Breakfast Today And Was Cracking All The Jokes

(Source) — On how the ‘luck of the Irish’ helped the Patriots this season: “I think back to the Super Bowl and I think of the luck of the Irish and how we the Kraft family and the Patriots benefited from the luck of the Irish, because as Malcolm Butler was intercepting that ball, all the Seattle Seahawks fans are yelling, ‘Give it to Lynch! Give it to Lynch!’ I’m thinking that’s OK because I’m thinking it’s congressman Stephen Lynch and I know we’re gonna be fine.” 

On Darrelle Revis: “We’ve been taking a lot of flak about losing one of our best players Darrelle Revis, and what happened. The story isn’t known, and I’m gonna tell the story here, and you’re gonna know how sensitive I am to what the people in this room care about. The money was about the same, he was actually favoring us, coming to us a little cheaper, but he had one demand, and that demand was . . . he wanted to change the name down the street here of Castle Island to Revis Island. I told him that was non-negotiable and a deal-breaker.”

On his new shiny space-saver: “The last time I was here, my good friend congressman Lynch here, I had trouble parking and he said, ‘Put a chair out there, it’ll be fine.’ It wasn’t fine. It didn’t happen. So I decided to bring a different space saver this time.”

Hahahha! Kraft! I hope he doesn’t get into the business of making people laugh because I’ll be out on my ass in no time. What can’t this guy do? Cardboard, football, models, fashion, comedy… whatever this guy sets his heart on he immediately dominates. Why did all the Seahawks fans want Carroll to hand the ball off to congressman Lynch? That seems like a horrible idea. And Revis? C’mon, that’s an outrageous demand dude. Some lesser people could claim that Kraft laughing through free agency is like Nero fiddling while Rome burns, but not I. I’ll blindly follow this man into battle, laughing all the way.