Shout Out To The Doctors In South Africa Who Performed The First Ever Successful Penis Transplant

VBU - For the first time in medical history, a penis transplant has been declared successful, doctors at the Stellenbosch University and Tygerberg Hospital in South Africa announced today. “We’ve proved that it can be done — we can give someone an organ that is just as good as the one that he had,” Frank Graewe, head of the Division of Plastic Reconstructive Surgery at Stellenbosch University, said in a statement. This is the world’s second penis transplant attempt. “We are very surprised by his rapid recovery,” said Andre Van der Merwe, the surgeon who led the operation and the head of Urology at Stellenbosch University.

Go ahead South Africa! While I’m a little upset they beat the US of A to the first dick transplant, I can’t knock them on this beautiful Friday. It’s just like when we won the space race. One small step for man, one giant dick for mankind. This is revolutionary. We see stories (from Florida) all the time about chicks cutting off their guy’s dicks. I feel like it happens WAY more than it should. Like come on gals, stop cutting off our dicks all the time. But now, check and mate. You can just hop on over to South Africa and get yourself a new one. Plus, Africa! So you know what that means…the supply of dicks are a bit…bigger. So basically if your woman chops off your dick, she’s doing you a favor. Suck on that, crazy bitches.