Porn ALWAYS Finds A Way

I remember it like it was yesterday, I was sitting at a beer garden near the West Village with a few friends, two of which were about to get married. There was new gossip about Khloe and Tristan Thompson. After multiple fuck ups, apparently Khloe was done. This last time, he hooked up with one of her sister's best friends (Jourdyn Woods). The girl about to get married (we'll call her Natalie) looks at her fiancé (we'll call him Jerome) and says, "you're too smart for that... cheating is the one thing I cannot tolerate." 

Hmmm? They don't call it the forgivable sin for nothing. 

After a few beats of thinking about whether I want to peel back the onion on this, I decide yes, let's get into it.

"Sooo... What is cheating exactly in your mind?" I say, and then follow it up with a "what if some ex hits him on Facebook or IG DM and they strike up a semi-flirty friendship. Is that cheating?" 

"Yes. Of course. That's a hard no!" Natalie blurts out

I look at Jerome to gauge his comfort level. He's fine. "What about someone he's never dated. If he becomes friends with a woman he used to know back in college and she tells him details about her relationship and vice versa, is that cheating?" I say

I know. This is not my business. But I was interested and they were happy to share. Human behavior is fascinating.

"Mmmm that depends, I guess." 

I can tell she hasn't exactly nailed down her definition just yet. 

"What if that same girl sends him a racy photo, is that cheating?"  I say

"NO. THAT IS DEFINITELY CHEATING." Natalie replies 

Jerome is calmly sipping his IPA, but slowly starting to feel the heat. 

"Ok... so that's cheating. OK. So, how is that different than him watching porn on his computer?" I prod 

And then it gets wild. Natalie says something that surprises me AND her fiancé. Shocks us.

"If Jerome watches porn, that is 100% cheating. I would leave him for sure." she says plainly 

Ohhhhhh. Someone want to tell her? 

Jerome finally jumps in, because, like me, he did NOT see this coming. 

"WHAT!? Porn is cheating? You would leave me if I watched porn. Porn." He says

"Yeah. I only want you to think of ME in that way. You getting off to anything or anyone else is cheating." Natalie retorts

WOW. Maybe it's just me, but I think they probably should have talked about this, maybe PRIOR to their engagement. A man without the comfort of porn? I mean, I've never even met one. 

Eventually, Jerome capitulated and said that he would agree to NEVER watch porn while they were married.

Yikes. 

The reason I bring this up, is because that type of thinking, that type of redlining, has consequences. Do you think men like Jerome aren't going to find a way to watch it, that they're going to abstain, for you? I'm 99.99% confident they will not. What they will do, is what a local Liverpool man recently got caught doing. 

According to an article in the Metro, "Professor Peter Davies, 70, an expert in tuberculosis, used his work computer after his wife put filters on his personal PC to stop him watching porn at home. Police were called in after NHS officials checked his machine at the Liverpool Heart and Chest Hospital and found he had viewed images of someone having sex with a horse and a dog." 

During the investigation he admitted ‘compulsively viewing pornography for a number of years’. When asked if he viewed porn at home, he said: ‘No I do not. My wife is at home. She put a filter on all my computers, I have had this problem from before then. I had some counselling and I stopped for a period of two years.’

See? He could have kept that dirty shit to himself in private but his wife had to go and place internet restrictions on him like he was her pubescent child. This is fucked. 

And it's not enough that he went through the embarrassment of having his CFO view his unorthodox online kink, the end result of the investigation was that the Professor was fired and most likely won't be able to practice in this field ever again. 

STEEP PENALTY. I mean I get it, but still. Tough break. 

So, ladies, I understand that you may have this image in your mind that only YOU can be the source of your man's sexual interest, and that's cute, but let's not get crazy. The last thing you want is your life partner to destroy his reputation, ruin his career and jeopardize his earning potential, all because your ego can't handle imagining him turned on by anyone else