The Barstool Fund - In Support Of The 30 Day FundLearn More

Historic Day for Horny Perverts Everywhere

April 14th is an infamous day in history with the deemed "unsinkable" Titanic striking an iceberg (1912) and the President of the United States getting shot in Ford's theater (1865.) What you didn't know is April 14th is also an infamous day for horny people, and we shouldn't forget its place in history.

First pony express letter from Missouri reaches San Fransisco (1860) It took riders 10 days to deliver a letter, but despite the hype it was not a financial success and went bankrupt 18 months later when faster telegraph lines were established. The pony express walked so we can anonymously order a latex sheath online and be fucking it 2 days later.

The winter of 1894 Thomas Edison had so much built up horniness that he decided to invent the kinetoscope, a device for one person to watch film through a peep hole. His invention was so perfect for jerking off that in April of 1894 he released it to the public that had been simply using their imagination or still photos. 

I know times are hard, but never forget ... there isn't a better time in history to be horny than right now.