Lowering The Bar: Fat Bastard's Nutty Stool Latte

It's a bit nutty. America's favorite pastime has gone from baseball football to drinking absurd amounts of coffee while scrolling Twitter. 

How would Barstool Bloggers handle drinking Fat Bastard's Nutty Stool? 

Not going to be many volunteers for this episode, even for the most avid coffee drinker. While the illnesses you'd contract from drinking human shit would surely kill you, what about the caffeine?

  • 400 mg of caffeine is considered part of a healthy diet.
  • The average cup of coffee has 95mg of caffeine in it. 
  • The average person consumes 110 - 260 mg of caffeine/day. 
  • Lethal doses would vary, but on average it would take 10,000 mg of caffeine to cause a human to overdose. 
  • The world's strongest coffee (no free ads) contains 702-928mg/ cup and would take more than 10 cups to kill you.

Assuming the exotic nuts in the stool sample don't add any additional caffeine, you should be good.

RATING:

This is just human shit that's been simmering on a hot plate.

Fat Bastards Nutty Stool Latte:  9.5/10* on the Lowering The Bar Scale of Disgusting 

It should be a perfect 10 because well, he's drinking literal shit. BUT, Austin did add sugar to his coffee and that's technically illegal at the bar.