So yesterday I get an email at like 2pm. Subject “Crazy Woman Destroys Dude’s Car”
Says, “We are over” on the side of the car and, “Jerk you suck” on the front. 54th and 8th around 1:30pm 12/1/14
So I’m thinking, jackpot. Heres a layup blog. Specific to New York. Don’t have to worry about any of the other bloggers scooping this up before me. Gonna write a blog all about crazy chicks when you break up and the way that guys and girls handle shit differently.
Then this morning I get a tweet
— Tom Lago (@TLags23) December 2, 2014
Well what the fuck is this about? Tow truck has been driving around this trashed Porsche for like 18 hours?
And then I get sent yet another pic, and this time the car is fucking red
Someone got caught
Other side said “we are through”
So I go back and look at the original picture and there it is, staring me right in the face
Fuck this shit man. Fuck this world. Fuck the internet. Nothing is real. Everything’s a prank. Everything is a ploy. Everything is an ad. I wanna blog about girls who take pictures of their face covered in cum as revenge porn. I wanna blog about dumb chicks who have meltdowns when their boyfriends dump them. I dont wanna have to research to find out if its a photoshop hoax or some elaborate advertising plot. I dont want to have to worry about Jimmy Kimmel. Its not just Jmac’s anymore. Everyone has gotta look over their shoulders. Everyone has gotta worry about pressing publish on a blog. And more importantly nothing is funny any more because its all fake. Sucks.
PS – When I was originally gonna blog this I was going to point out that going with “JERK” on the windshield is the biggest pussy move ever for breakup revenge of this magnitude. Makes sense now why it wasnt more profane