Let me ask you an honest question – do you think Leanna Bartlett is dead? Like did she suffer some horrible tragedy and she’s actually no longer with us? Or is she a fake chick? Because she’s been featured on Barstool 6 weeks in a row now. And we haven’t heard a fucking peep from her. No tweets. No emails. No nothing. Ali Lee found herself on Barstool the very first day she was featured on Guess That Ass. 2 days later she was on KFC Radio. 3-4 weeks ago Big Cat just told a story about a kid he watched on Global Guts TWENTY YEARS AGO and we found him in like a day. How the fuck has Leanna Bartlett not reached out to Barstool in any way shape or form? It just never happens. We usually find whoever we’re talking about in like a couple days, let alone 6 weeks.
Honestly, I think she’s dead. I think she was a beautiful model with one of the greatest asses of all time and she met an untimely demise. Suffered a horrendous tragedy. Like walking into a plane propeller or something like that other chick. Or maybe she’s a sexy hologram like in that movie S1m0ne with Al Pacino? Other than that there’s just absolutely zero reason for a chick to get this much publicity from the Stool with zero contact. Good or bad – either they reach out and they love us or they reach out and say don’t ever feature me again like Ring Girl. But either way, we would have heard from her now.
Dead or alive, thats one amazing ass though. Personally I’m skewed because me and Ali are practically dating now after she came on the show. But this is a Democracy. An ass-judging democracy. But before you cast your ballot, I’m adding one more picture of Leanna. If she’s gonna reach Jordan status with the Rings she’s gonna have to earn it:
Vote 1 for the dead champion Leanna Bartlett, Vote 10 for the Stoolie star Ali Lee