Matthew McConaughey's presence has been one of the best things to come out of this quarantine. Not only is he playing Bingo with the elderly and putting out inspirational messages whose effects are only magnified by his silky smooth accent that lingers like molasses, but now he's giving us #McConaugheyTakes.
While it's true that I would listen to him read the dictionary, I am excited to hear his takes about some of the movies he's been in. Especially because he's not on interview 23 of a long, press junket day; he's relaxed in the comfort of his own home. And if anyone has stories to tell, it's the man that was caught playing his bongos with nothing on but a smile. (I really hope he talks about True Detective. Obviously it's not a movie, but Rust was so deep, dark, and sad - I want to hear more about him. More importantly, I want to hear about all the shit he and his bff, Woody Harrelson, got into. Mind-blowing advice included.)
But that will have to wait because first up on his takes journey is my favorite modern-day rom-com.
"You also, in a romantic comedy, you can get mad, but you can't get really full of rage bc you'll sink the ship. There's a buoyancy that they're built on where you have to bounce from cloud to cloud. Dance between the raindrops, I always used to say."
I mean, only Matthew McConaughey could talk about a movie in which he's referred to as "Mr. Sniffles," "Princess Sofia" and "Krull, Warrior King" and pull out some eloquent, philosophical, metaphor that makes you feel like the Academy snubbed his performance. "But he danced between raindrops! Doesn't that mean anything to you people!"
Guess not. But something tells me he's not too worried about it.
Talking about mailbox money, which is money you make that comes in the mailbox because people watch shows - used to be DVDs and now it's streaming - that film HANDS DOWN BY FAR [he says with a smirk on his face] has given me my most mailbox money of any film I've ever done.
A part of me thought he would drop some sort of Leonardo DiCaprio-on-the-Titanic comment about how at the time it seemed like the right movie for him to do, but looking back, well, it's wasn't necessarily his finest moment. Tons of actors do it, so it wouldn't necessarily be a surprising move.
Not McConaughey, though. The moment he started talking about that 10 Days money, the smirk showed no restrain. Sure, maybe Benny Boo Boo didn't get him the Golden Statue, but he did give him some sort of gold.
And still people - talk about repeat viewings - people watch that show over and over and over.
The love fern! The damn love fern! That became a character in its own.
It's true. I'm pretty sure "relationship plants" became a thing after this. (I don't technically know this, but let's be honest, some girls saw this and thought it was a cute idea, and some guys saw this and bought their gals a fern after they fucked up. 100%.)
And then there's the dog, whose name I can never remember. What's the name of that damn dog?
Krull. The name of your dog was Krull, the same name you gave your penis.
Guess when you're overflowing with mailbox money that's STILL coming all these years later, the name of the little guy that got you there just isn't important anymore.
At least now I know why he pissed on his pool table.