What's With Everyone Fucking Dolphins?

I'm pretty sure a lot of people are at the plane is going down scene in 'Almost Famous' with the level of honesty due to coronavirus right now. I've found two articles in the past two weeks talking about how humans admit to fucking dolphins, but both claim the dolphins came on to them.

First I found this guy.

Apparently the guy in that tweet who claims the dolphin seduced him is Malcolm Brenner, a guys who's been admitting to his dolphin fuckery for years. They even made a documentary about him. 

Love that movie poster. According to the Daily Mirror Brenner was filling Dolly's blowholes for over a year. 

He has written a novel, Wet Goddess, which tells the story of a young man who has a sexual relationship with a dolphin, Ruby, while he’s working at a theme park.

Malcolm has admitted the book is autobiographical and based on his own experiences.

He said: “I wrote this book for dolphins because we are mistreating these animals by keeping them in captivity.”

'Wet Goddess,' gross. Also maybe so on the mistreating them with captivity thing, but you didn't have fan the flames by fucking them Malcolm. This was back int he 70s when he was a photographer for dolphins. I bet he took some incredible photos.

Then today, I stumble upon this!

Again the Daily Mirror is the source.

This lady Margaret Howe Lovatt is the OG of dolphin fuckers because she did her dolphin sex back in the 60s. Maybe she was Malcolm Brenner's inspiration. That or it could have been his overwhelming desire to have sex with a water based species even though he knew if anyone found out they'd make a documentary out of it decades later. 

Margaret had this to say about her dolphin that came on to her. 

She explained: "Peter liked to be… with me. He would rub himself on my knee, my foot or my hand and I allowed that. She added: "It was sexual on his part - it was not sexual on mine, sensuous perhaps.

Well geez lady I'm glad it was something for you, because jerking off a dolphin at a NASA funded study while feeling empty inside is pretty dark. 

I was starting to get a little weirded out that I kept finding these articles at the Daily Mirror again so I cross referenced. 

Turns out it's not a new story, it's just being brought back up again. So what's with all the dolphin fucking stories by the same person at the Daily Mirror? How many more people are out there that are fucking dolphins and should we be concerned that the dolphins themselves are predators or is that just bs spin from the humans that were screwing animals? I'm definitely not swimming with dolphins once I'm allowed back on vacation until I get some answers.