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If You're Not Wearing Joggers You're An Idiot Sucker

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I kind of hate having to write this since anyone who knows anything already knows about joggers, but then I remember Portnoy’s blog last year where he pretended he invented pants so I need to make sure he doesn’t take these too. Buy joggers. This isn’t me trying to make a fashion statement, this is just me allowing you a look into your future: you will be wearing joggers by next spring if you have a lick of fashion sense. The sooner you do it, the sooner you can say you were in on it early. Best pants ever. They’re as comfortable as sweatpants, look like real pants, and have the elastic ankle so you don’t even have to waste your time pegging your jeans. Do you like feeling good? Do you like liking good? Well then they’re unbeatable. Accept that they’re the wave and buy them now.