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Rex Ryan Offers Up the Weakest Rex Ryan Preseason Prediction Ever and it Weirdly Makes Me Sad

NY Daily NewsThe guy you used to know probably would have circled the block with a megaphone, telling everyone that this is the year when the Jets shock the world and win the Super Bowl. He was fun. The guy sitting in front of you on a hot summer afternoon is bursting at the seams to say the same things, but claims he knows better now… While much of the NFL world expects little more than mediocrity from the Jets this season, the man in charge believes his team is nothing like the group that needed a few lucky breaks to win eight games in 2013. “I believe we’re better than that. I believe we’re a lot better than that,” Ryan told the Daily News. “Eight and eight would be a hell of a disappointment for us. I’m just telling you that I believe this team is on the cusp of doing some special things. . . . I’m confident we will be a playoff team… I think it’s a transition year, but we’re going to bring it to another level. I know where I want this team to go and that’s where I expect this team to go. So, you know, are we a better team? Dang right. . . . That may be a fact that we’re rebuilding this team, but by no means does that mean that I don’t expect to improve on where we were.”

Wait.  What?  Training camp is less than a week away and this is all we get out of Rex Ryan?  Is this all you can conjure, Saruman? Some half hearted, mealy mouthed, lukewarm drivel about being “confident” the Jets will “be a playoff team”?  Hell, San Diego was a playoff team last year at 9-7.  A couple of years before that, Denver won their division at 8-8.  This is not a Rex Ryan prediction.  The Shrex we know and love you could always count on this time of year to take off the gloves and start laying down the smack.  Sexy Rexy Super Bowl predictions were as much a part of July as weekend traffic and burning your ass on vinyl car seats.  And now all we get is some vague claptrap about transition years and being better than 8-8, and it’s truly depressing.  They say the happiest and saddest day of a boy’s life is when he finally beats his dad at something because you realize the old man has lost a step.  I never really understood how that felt until now because in a way it’s awful to see Rex a shadow of himself like this.  It’s like getting rolled over in the AFC East every year has finally broken his will.   Now all the fight has gone out of a guy who used to personify swagger and confidence.  He’s Biff Tannen at the end of the first “Back to the Future,” washing and waxing George McFly’s car.  He’s Clinton after he got caught getting windys from the help.  In 201o he was Theon Greyjoy, now he’s just Reek.  And it’s sad to see him reduced to this.  So please, Rex, I beg of you: Go back to your old shooting-your-mouth-off self, now before it’s too late.  I need your crazy ass, insanely bold and unreasonable predictions and I need them now.  You complete me.  @JerryThornton1