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Ranking The Barstool Sports Employees Most Likely To Get The Coronavirus

6. Donnie

Had to throw him in here. It wouldn't shock me if Donnie has legitimately considered getting COVID-19 for content purposes. I think he's considering it.

5. Paul Lo Duca & BlackJack Fletcher

These two would get Coronavirus and then somehow find a way to go to a random Penn National horse racing track while still quarantined. 

4. Tommy Smokes

I've known Tommy Smokes for a long time. I think it's close to half a decade now. The guy is always sick. Just a constant circle of either being sick, about to be sick, or getting over being sick. He's asked me a bunch about how concerned should he be about the coronavirus showing he's concerned. I think he should be.

3. White Sox Dave

We are at 4 confirmed cases in Illinois. Something strikes me about White Sox Dave being in direct contact with one of those 4. Maybe he knew him from the gym or it was his delivery guy? Who knows. I just have a feeling that White Sox Dave may have been in contact with one of the four confirmed cases in Illinois.

2. Mantis

The man's immune system cannot be that strong. I mean, I don't want him to get it, but would I be shocked? Nope.

1. Call Her Daddy girls:

I wouldn't be surprised if they actually want to get it. Anyway for them to do the least amount of work possible, count them in. Plus the COVID - COVID 9000 would be a sick sex move probably.