Advertisement

Discovery Channel Is Going To Put A Dude In A "Snake Proof Suit" And Let An Anaconda Eat Him

Screen Shot 2014-11-04 at 11.02.33 PMScreen Shot 2014-11-04 at 11.02.51 PM

B2CHave you ever wondered what it’s like to be eaten alive? A naturalist and wildlife filmmaker will attempt to answer the question next month, in a new and controversial show on the Discovery channel. Paul Rosolie will don a custom-made snake-proof suit, and be swallowed alive by an anaconda, in an attempt to document what it’s like to enter the belly of the creature. The show will air on the Discovery channel on December 7th. However, many are already speaking against the show, calling the experiment animal cruelty and asking if the event will be harmful or stressfull to the snake. Pet Snakes, a website for those who keep snakes as pets, warns that regurgitation of undigested food can be unhealthy for the animals. PawNation, another animal enthusiast site, warns of the same thing: Not only is the snake not receiving the nutrients from his food, but the regurgitation process also robs the snake of essential digestive acids from his stomach.

Never in the history of humanity has there ever been a whiter moment than a dude letting an anaconda snake eat him. That is absolutely peak levels of caucasity. Never in a billion, trillion, zillion years would you find a black dude or a Puerto Rican who would sign up for this crazy shit.

My favorite part has gotta be the “snake proof suit.” I ask you, what in the fuck is a snake proof suit? You just gonna be in like a super high tech wet suit or something? Like a Batman suit? I’m envisioning like a Green Man costume but somehow protects you from snakes. And then you lay there like a dickhead until an anaconda eats you up, and you hang out in the belly of a snake until it pukes you up like that old Ebaumsworld video where the anaconda puked up a hippo.  Awesome stuff, man. You’ve gotta be the biggest asshole on the planet but I will 150,000% tune in to watch you suit up and feed yourself to a 40 foot snake, so I guess its mission accomplished.

PS – All these wildlife advocates saying its animal abuse can get lost. First of all we’re talking about snakes. And not just any snakes, fucking Anacondas. Fucking Lucifer himself took the form of a snake, because thats how fucking scary they are. Anacondas don’t need PETA watching out for them. They are just like 30 feet of slithery evil. They can eat a dude and puke him up and just keep snakin around. Dont cry for Anacondas.

PPS – Seriously think for a second how fucking crazy you have to be to get inside the belly of a monster snake. Even if you’re some maniac wildlife freak and you think you’re 100% on board with this lunacy, the moment you’re going down the hatch you have gotta freak the fuck out. I dont care what the fuck a “snake proof suit” is, there is no way I want to be inside the stomach of another animal, let alone the most terrifying one on the planet earth. You could torture my mother right before my eyes and tell me the only way to make it stop would be to let an anaconda eat me and I’d be like “sorry, ma.”