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Joe Thronton Says If He Scored 4 Goals He'd Start Jerking Off Right On The Ice

Joe Thornton would unzip his pants if he scored four goals
Hearing a question to Marleau about Hertl and whether he was showboating, Thornton said:
“Shut up, have you ever played the game?”
When the press turned his way, he then added:
“I’d have my cock out if I scored four goals. I’d have my cock out, stroking it.”
OK, then.
Would you jerkoff if you scored 4 goals in an NHL game? Stupid question, of course you would. I mean right now the main causes of my masturbation are: I just did GTA and now I’m horny, it’s bedtime, or I just woke up with a boner and if I don’t cum first then I’m gonna piss all over the floor when I go to the bathroom. All worthy reasons, but not nearly the level of “I just put up shinny numbers against the best players in the world.” That’s the best reason ever to get a hard dick and pop off.