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Name That Nation: Cops Are Called To The Scene After Two People Were Fighting Each Other Using Hockey Sticks As Weapons

Alright so that was the easiest answer of all time. But there are still so many questions left unanswered here. For starters, I need the backstory. Typically I'd figure these hosers were out at a bar, had a few too many Molsons, started to chirp each other, things got physical, and both of these pigeons raced out to their car to carry the largest piece of weaponry they own to beat the piss out of each other. But then you look at the timestamp on those tweets from the York Regional Police and this was at 8am this morning, before most good hard workin' folks in Canada even had a chance to grab their Tim Horton's yet. 

So what happened here? A quick game of pickup before everybody heads off to work got a little too heated? Maybe they were dropping the kids off at school and buddy ended up cutting in the drop off lane? We need the deets here because this seems like something straight out of an episode of Trailer Park Boys. 

And most importantly, we need to know what type of twigs these guys were hacking around. Were they breaking out the Warrior Alpha DX and taking advantage of the stick's lightweight, flat-weave carbon with a powerful release and enhanced feel? Or did they just grab the Sher-Wood 5030 out of the garage because you can bash someone's skull to pieces with that thing, and also the Coffey curve is the GOAT? Or even worse...did one of these bastards pull out a Nike aluminum stick?

Honestly, the sticks being used here are the most crucial details to this story. Because depending on which twig each of these grocery sticks were wielding should determine if they should face some attempted murder charges or not. And now that I think about it, maybe my calling in life is to become a detective in Canada. All it comes down to is knowing the right questions to ask. I'd be the Canadian Sherlock Holmes. Or as they refer to him in the native tongue, Holmesy.