Forget About The Monday After The Super Bowl, Monday After March Madness Should Be A National Holiday

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Every year people complain about the Monday after the Super Bowl. Since the NFL refuses to just have the biggest sporting event of the year on a Saturday we all have to suffer that Monday morning hangover. Stuffed with buffalo wings, bloated on beer, salsa and guacamole and bleu cheese running through your veins and you have to trudge your ass to work in the freezing winter cold of February. Every year there’s those idiots who submit online petitions to the White House asking Obama to declare that Monday a National Holiday.

Now obviously that would be amazing. But the real day we all need off is today. Right now. The Monday after March Madness opening weekend. The feeling today is a different type of hangover. Monday after Super Bowl is like your typical drink too much, ate too much, stayed up late hangover. Today I feel like a junkie who needs to get high. An addict chasing his next high. After 4 straight days of controversy and upsets, buzzer beaters and Cinderellas, small children crying and white boys dancing, band members going bananas while schools back home riot, gambling money and cheering against yourself for the upset, I just have this empty feeling this morning. 12 hours per day of incredible college hoops for 4 straight days and now – poof – its all gone. Nothing for the next few days. Its not like I drank too much and stayed up all night. Its just after an entire week of mailing it in and getting shitfaced and basing your entire life around the tournament of 64 you need some sort of decompression period. Its almost like how you can’t just shoot right to the surface when you’re Scuba diving. You return to the surface too fast and you get the Bends. You need ease back into human life.

Right now we’re all like 120 feet beneath the surface, swimming with the fishes, and this morning we get fucking YANKED back to the top and tossed right back in the boat. Downright dangerous.