The Dozen Season 3 Kicks Off from Philadelphia | Matchups 1 & 2WATCH NOW

Help...My Girlfriend Can't...She's Literally Dying

I more or less wrote this skit back in January after the Grammy’s but thats OK. These guys made it come to life. I’ll just consider myself the executive producer or something.

The Anne Hathaway Cure for Beyonce Death is a nice touch. Although Anne Hathaway is Jennifer Lawrence’s foil, not Beyonce. Chicks love J-Law because they’re dumb and they buy her whole “I’m just a goofy regular girl” shtick. They despise Anne Hathaway for reasons unknown. I don’t think there are any concrete reasons for chicks to hate Anne Hathaway as much as they do, but they sure hate her with the fire of a thousand suns. I think they see her short hair and pale skin and think she’s some smug prissy stuck up bitch. Makes no sense but its almost 100% agreed upon universally amongst the female species.

The truth is I don’t know if there’s any cure for Beyonce Death right now. Theres no actress or singer out there right now that chicks hate as much as they love Beyonce. Its an epidemic that can’t be stopped.