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Happy 40th Birthday, Kelly Kapowski!

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There is only one woman on the planet earth who was more influential in my life than Kelly Kapowski, and that’s my mother.  And even thats still a toss up.  Kelly Kapowski was THAT important. A combination of Jamie Powell on Charles in Charge and her let me know I wasn’t gay.

She is the most important Smokeshow of the 90s generation.  Some will argue Pam Anderson as CJ in Baywatch. Point well taken, valid argument there.  But nobody could relate to The Hoff and a crew of life guards running around the beach.  Every kid could relate to Bayside School: Every guy wanted to be Zack, and wanted to fuck Kelly.  And by “wanted to fuck” I mean “wanted to give Kelly one of those television/movie kisses where you open your mouth but don’t slip any tongue.”

Whether she was working at the Max:

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Or in her lifeguard uniform at Malibu Sands in her high waisted 90s one piece:

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Or in a various assortment of floral pattern dresses:

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She’s the greatest Highschool Cheerleader Babe of All Time, Kelly Kapowski always has been, and always will be the most important Smokeshow of the 1990s. Happy birthday you sexy, sexy legend.

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