Rocket - A young man from Nanjing, China, has been arrested after stealing more than 800 social science textbooks, history compendiums and poetry books from a book shop in the town. When questioned by police, the young man maintained that he was searching for ‘the meaning of life’ within the books’ pages. Noticing that an unusually large amount of highbrow reading material was going unaccounted for, the owner of the book shop contacted the local authorities, wherein plain-clothes officers were sent to keep an eye out for the thief or thieves. Midway through their investigation, officers spotted a young man who would always arrive at the book shop on an electric bicycle that had ample storage space. Whenever he left the store, the same young man always appeared to be carrying several brand-new books, which he quickly stowed in his bike before riding off.
Books is where you think you’ll find the meaning of life? Gotta be the Asian parent influence. The whole “you’re not worth my time until you’re a doctor and/or designed a new and inanimate object to have sex with” thing. Well pull up a chair, young buck, because you’re not gonna find the meaning of life with your nose buried in the spine of a book. I don’t care how many Mitch Albom books you steal. You can read Tuesdays with Morrie and The Five People You Meet in Heaven 100 times, it still won’t hit you. The meaning of life is to drink, fuck, laugh, have fun, procreate, maybe cry a bit when no one is looking. It’s not to spend all day in the stacks of the library highlighting the words of someone else and jotting down marginalia. That will do you no good. There’s no exam at the end of life dude, it’s 100% based on class participation.