Dude Arrested For Trying To Fuck A Drink Cart On A Train

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Huff Po – A Scottish man who attempted to have sex with a train drinks cart while drunk and high has been sentenced to 100 hours of community service in Perth Sheriff Court in Scotland. Andrew Davidson was reportedly under the influence of a drugs and alcohol when he began aggressively flirting with female passengers and the operator of an on-board drinks cart during an afternoon ScotRail train ride in July, according to the Scotsman. Davidson approached the railway employee and tried to kiss her. After the employee broke free and ran off the train, however, Davidson turned his amorous eye onto less animate subjects. “He then approached the unattended trolley and started rubbing himself against the trolley,” official Jim Eodanable told the court, according to the Scotsman. Alarmed passengers on the train noted that Davidson also appeared to be talking to the cart, shouting “I want to kiss you, I want to f*** you” as he humped it, Metro reports. The 25-year-old Davidson later said he had no memory of the incident but wrote the court a letter expressing remorse for his actions. His lawyer, Grant Bruce, asked for leniency in the case, noting that the incident was completely out of character for his client, who he argued was on a “legal high,”according to STV News.

How about Andy Davidson here? Just Joe Namath-ing this drink cart. Made that cart his inanimate Suzy Kolber. Gotta be honest here if I’m fucking an inanimate object on a train, drink cart has gotta be one of my last choices. There’s no where to put you dick. Only place would be like a drawer of some sorts, and nobody is trying to stick their dick in a drawer. I’d probably just go with the seats, right? Stick your dick in between the cushions? Thats really the go-to choice no matter where you are if you’re talking about fucking something thats not alive.

But I guess you don’t think clearly when you’re on a “legal high.” I gotta get on board with more of those. Get all lit up on drugs and alcohol, try to stick my dick wherever I want and just blame it on being legally high. Get on that salvia train and hump all sorts of shit.