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The Offseason From Hell Continues: Former Patriot Gets Eliminated from MasterChef

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It goes without saying that this has been one of the toughest offseasons any NFL team has ever had to endure.  I mean, we don’t need to rehash what prolific offensive weapon went to what team, or what record-breaking tight end had how many surgeries or who killed who.  Suffice it to say it’s been more than most teams could bear without wholesale firings, resignations and maybe even a few guys faking their own death to distance themselves from the debacle.

And last night the bad streak continued with another disaster: Former Patriot Eddie Jackson was finally eliminated from MasterChef.  In case you haven’t been watching or don’t remember him (and you wouldn’t be alone) Jackson was a bottom of the roster cornerback behind Asante Samuel and Ellis Hobbs on the 2007 16-0 team.  He played 3 games and made 3 tackles before blowing his wrist out in the weight room and was never heard from again.  That is until this summer when he emerged as one of the best amateur cooks on TV. And believe me, Master Chef is no half-assed competition.  It ain’t Hell’s Kitchen.  These people are amateurs but they are frigging good.  And even though he was with 3 different teams in his 4 year career, it’s that cup of coffee he had with the Pats he was bragging to Gordon Ramsey about all season. It’s how he defines his career. Or did, before he started doing pioneering work in the field of Jamaican Jerk Meatloaf.    Unfortunately for Eddie, this week’s sushi was his Tom Coughlin, the one obstacle he couldn’t overcome, and he was eliminated with only five chefs left.

It’s just a goddamned shame he never got a chance to show the Peanut Butter & Jelly skills Belichick taught him.  Otherwise he’d still be in the competition.  Just another tough break in a summer full of them.