Rich People Hate Talking Face To Face

(AdWeek) – They say email can’t replace face-to-face communication. Tell that to the rich, though. People with a household income of $250,000 and up are more likely to use the Web to stay in touch with friends and family (96 percent) than traditional ways (81 percent), according to the Shullman Luxury and Affluence Monthly Pulse. Email is the most popular Web-based method (favored by 78 percent), followed by texting (65 percent) and Facebook (55 percent), although it’s notable that among those under 35, Facebook is preferred by 69 percent. Business communication is also moving online; 89 percent prefer Web-based options versus 75 percent who use traditional ways, although among the under-35 age group, that figure falls to below 50 percent.

A lot of people have lofty aspirations in life. They want to change the world, help people, visit exotic locations. I’m less ambitious. I’d like to be so wealthy that I never have to interact with people. I want to be Howard Hughes rich so that I just sit in a room and watch movies and piss in jars and drink milk straight from the fucking utter. Who wouldn’t want that? This makes perfect sense from rich people. Normal people are gross. They’re all dirty and poor and shit. Fuck that. I’ll sit in my fancy house and look at your words on my iPad but there’s no way I want to touch your hand or listen to your stupid voice. I mean if we’re being honest with each other who genuinely enjoys talking to people? Like that’s not really a thing. I might, might, actually like 30% of my friends. “Call me” devolved to “email me” which became “text me” which I’m praying soon becomes “ya know what, we had a good run. Let’s leave it at that.”