Tommy Pham Will Eat Your First Born Son Then Throw Batting Practice To Himself

That’s the most locked in postgame interview Tampa’s ever given. Tommy Pham will cut your skin off and wear it as a goddamn bathrobe. When he was coming up in St. Louis and I was obligated to hate his fucking guts – all you’d hear is how crazy Tommy Pham is. How he is the weirdest guy in every room and the most serious dude on the field. How he sits in the clubhouse reciting his stat line to anyone who will listen while holding lifelong grudges against anyone who has ever wronged him. From Sports Illustrated last year on how intense he is:

They said, ‘We believed you could do it all along.’ That’s the thing that’s so mind-boggling. I said, If that’s the f—–’ case, then why was I f—–’ demoted to Triple A? If that’s the case, why the f— was I batting in the eight hole this year, behind the guy who got f—–’ called up from high A? That s—, that’s that fake s—, man. I’m from a background where my mom kept it so real. My mom would be like, ‘Man, look, I don’t have no money to get you nothing for Christmas, I don’t have no money to get you nothing for your birthday. I’m sorry. I gotta pay the bills.’ I respected her because, s—, she told us from the get-go. All that fake s—, man, I was never raised like that.”

Tommy Pham goes hard as fuck. That’s the whole essence of the Tampa Rays. High ceiling players that for one reason or another, missed an opportunity or were overlooked. Mix in some power arms and a front office willing to get weird and you have yourself the Tampa Rays. Literally impossible not to pull for this team if your dog’s out of the fight

Then again the most compelling argument for the Astros tomorrow is one of the most compelling arguments you can make in sports: they have a better shot to beat the Yankees.

Fair logic but I feel this one more with my heart than crotch.

Go Rays.