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Lonzo Ball Admitted That He Had To Change His Big Baller Shoes After Every Quarter Because They Would Rip During Games

Did LaVar Ball do it again or did LaVar Ball do it again? I know the haters out there will take that quote and twist it to their own narrative of Lonzo Ball’s shoes being made from cheap materials likely by LiAngelo in the Big Baller Basement. But that’s how small ballers think. Big Ballers remember the biggest viral moment in basketball this year was Zion’s shoe blowing up on his foot during a game.

The sports world pretty much stopped when that happened. Twitter had jokes for days, Obama (probably) said it was the craziest moment he’s ever been a part of, and people wondered how such a viral moment would effect Nike. I’m pretty sure Rovell can still get hard crunching the numbers of potential earnings lost for Nike that night. However, if you fast forward to today, you will notice Nike is still an absolute force, Zion signed with a Nike subsidiary in Jordan, Duke is still a Nike school, and all that moment did was put the word Nike on everyone’s brain and tongue for days on end without costing them a cent.

Am I saying that LaVar Ball was actually trying to have his son and brand go viral back when he was playing as the 2nd pick for one of the NBA’s banner franchises while Zion was still posterizing scared short white kids in high school? Maybe, maybe not, maybe fuck yourself. I admit it would take immense foresight for an individual to scheme a plot like that and all LaVar has done is send his kids to play pro overseas instead of college years before it became cool and also started his own league to compete with the NCAA for prep stars before the NBA changed the rules of the G-League to make it a real alternative to college hoops. So I guess you can say LaVar has all the foresight needed to make this move and then some. In fact, the only wrinkle in LaVar’s plan would be his son continually defusing the bomb on his foot from going off by changing his shoes every quarter. A for effort, D for execution. At least Lonzo can play in real shoes now, spike his value while playing with Zion, and cash in on that 2nd contract since that’s where the real money is anyway as LaMelo tries to play his way to the Number 1 pick in Australia.

The lesson? Kings stay kings. Always.

Ahhhh who am I kidding? The ZO2s were trash from the minute they were released or when KFC got his pair 6 months after he preordered them and they arrived 3 sizes too big.