For Some Reason, A Judge Thinks Lindsay Lohan Meeting Her Fans Shouldn't Count Toward Community Service Hours

TIME (because I’m smart) – Lindsay Lohan has been accused of trying to include socializing with fans as some of the 80 hours of community service she was supposed to perform for a 2012 reckless driving charge. Lohan, 28, reportedly included meeting several fans during a stage production of Speed-the-Plow, in which she starred in the U.K. last year, as part of the mandatory 4,800 minutes she had to spend benefiting the community.

Her lawyer, Shawn Holley, appeared in court Wednesday to submit a dossier of documents outlining the Mean Girls actress’s community service hours, which Lohan claims were completed in nine days. Lohan also apparently awarded herself hours for allowing star-struck fans to shadow her, reports USA Today.

Like anyone who has a heartbeat, I love Lindsay Lohan. Watching her and Amanda Bynes transform from cute innocent little child actors into the psychopaths they are today has brought a ton of joy to my life. It also helps me rationalize the life decisions I have made that led me to become a blogger. But my love for Lindsay Lohan, as I’m sure is the case for the majority of you, only runs so deep. To put a twist on an old old ancient saying a prophet once said, I love her because I ain’t her. And here’s why I think this “judge” who is making such a fuss about LiLo trying to pass off meet-and-greets as community service is such a bozo.

Do you really want Lindsay Lohan cleaning up the parks where our children go to play? Fuck no. Do you really want to send Lindsay Lohan to go work with underprivileged kids or help out the homeless? Absolutely not. Because she’s a cunt and would only make them feel worse. Listen, if there are actual people in this world who love Lindsay Lohan for more reasons than to just watch her spiral out of control, then those people are just as psychotic (if not more) as Lindsay herself. So let’s keep the crazies with the crazies. We don’t need anyone trying to integrate Lindsay Lohan back into actual society. For the benefit of all of us, let her do her. Unless she’s picking up garbage on the side of the interstate with people launching their Wendy’s Frosties at her, she shouldn’t really be servicing the community.