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Dear Lizzy, I Need First Date Suggestions That Do Not Involve Booze


Dear Lizzy,

I wanted to get your opinion on good first date spots that don’t involve alcohol. I recently quit drinking and one reason I haven’t been as active on Bumble, Tinder, etc is because I struggle to come up with good first date spots that don’t involve meeting for a drink or two. I don’t drink coffee either. That being said, what would be some ideal spots for a first date with someone I haven’t met? I do live in a major city.

– Steve

Dear Steve,

There are plenty of date options that do NOT involve alcohol, but there are NOT a ton of FIRST date options that don’t in some way involve booze or coffee.

First things first, if you want to avoid bringing up the drinking conversation all together, your first date move has to be coffee. And guess what? You don’t have to order coffee! Any sort of beverage will work because it’s just coffee and there is zero explanation needed in that situation.

Secondly, there are very few first dates that involve anything other than a quick drink/coffee. Could you take a girl to dinner on the first date? Sure, but 1) she’s likely going to expect you get a drink with dinner and 2) if she sucks, you’re stuck with her for an entire meal.

What about suggesting a fun activity like bowling or mini-golf? This is a big hit or miss for a first date. Some women would HATE it and think it’s lame or too much too soon, but on the flip side, if the girl is into you, this could be a fun, light-hearted way to get to know you better.

Which leads to my final point: you should be upfront with the person you’re dating about your sober habits. Not because you need to warn them, but because it’s not the norm and it might be an immediate deal-breaker for the wrong person. Listen, they’re going to find out eventually and there’s no point in wasting your time and their time. I understand the idea of someone not wanting to date you because you don’t drink may be frustrating, but that doesn’t make it any less true.

Good luck!

– Lizzy




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