Fucking what is happening man?? Another one?? First we had the chick in Texas licking a container of Blue Bell ice cream and we all hoped that would be the end of it. Some things in this world are sacred, and outside the bounds of internet pranks, and ice cream is one of those things. In an otherwise cruel and unfair world, ice cream provides an unmatched relief to everyday people who are suffering. But then I wake up today and I see ANOTHER person has violated the social contract we all signed upon being born. Not only did he lick the ice cream, he fingered it THEN LICKED IT AGAIN before putting it back. What a sick fuck. He was two seconds away from putting his dick in it. It’s made even more egregious when you add in the fact that he posted the video himself. The lengths people will go for internet clout these days is terrifying.
The leaders of the world need to call an emergency meeting and figure out how to stop this ASAP. I’m serious, people licking containers of ice cream and putting them back in the freezer is a more pressing issue than global warming and cancer combined. We need to come together as a human race and put a stop to it before it becomes an epidemic. What punishment is fitting for such a heinous crime? A hefty fine? Community service? Prison time? My suggestion is these people get the electric chair and nothing less. The people who do this are menaces to society and not fit for our world. Get rid of them.
I will say this, regardless of how many of these disgusting videos come out, I will never stop buying ice cream. Because the day we all stop buying ice cream is the day the tongue terrorists win. Don’t let them win. Keep buying ice cream.