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Justin Bieber Formally Challenges Tom Cruise To A Fight In The UFC Octagon...Wait What???

Tell ya what – I did not expect to be writing about this matchup the night after UFC 238, but I’m here for it!

It’s 2019, the year of our lord, and Justin Bieber wants a piece of Tom Cruise. Why? Who the hell knows! Maybe he finally got around to seeing Cruise’s ‘Mummy’ reboot and he just wants to slap Tommy around a little. If my guy Uncle Dana isn’t gonna put this fight on though, I PROMISE you that we will in the squared circle at the next Rough N Rowdy.

Personally, I think Cruise kicks the ever living shit out of Bieber in the cage or the ring. Yeah, he’s famously short (only 2 inches shorter than Bieber), and more than twice Justin’s elder, but you’ve all heard the stories about ‘Mission: Impossible’…dude’s a fucking savage who performs all of his own stunts and breaks his bones in every shot. Biebs’ has been looking all bizarre and strung out recently, so yeah – I’m thinkin he wants no part of Ethan Hunt.

P.S. My good pal Coley Mick texted me and said that he’s thinking that this may be next-level marketing for the return of Celebrity Death Match, and if that were true, it would be AWESOME.