The Legend Of Twitter's Horniest Catfish
I’ve been on Twitter for 8+ years now. That’s a doctorate degree worth of studying and analyzing a vast collection of the worst thoughts and opinions ever conceived from the worst human beings never aborted. I’ve seen the rise and fall of extremely grown men posing as ultra-relatable, animated Pixar fish and Disney princesses. I’ve witnessed Vine stars lose their post-marital virginities in real-time. Darren Rovell exists. I’ve watched the leader of the free world habitually misspell Good Night Moon words, and verified journalists devote their free time to progressively self-destructing in his replies. I’ve desperately favorited my cyber crushes’ pictures without worrying about that action inexplicably showing up on the timelines of my followers. Aaron Hernandez’s CTE would’ve killed to have the effects that Twitter has had on my brain.
The point is that nothing really fazes me anymore on that app, and as far as I’m concerned, nothing on there even has the ability to make me feel concerned about anyone or anything anymore. However…when I truly sense that the lives of very young and innocent women are in serious danger, I don’t necessarily care, but I’m compelled to at least write about it and turn it into a joke.
Enter @reecetwelshh
Straight out of Kevin Spacey’s wettest dreams, Taylor Welsh “is” a Midwestern American beauty who looks like he’s somewhere between the ages of seven and 21, and appears to be one of the usual suspects in my ongoing quest to expose tweetdeckers.
Lethally sharp jawline: CHECK
Super viral pinned tweet stolen from wholesome sorority girl: CHECK
This shit: CHECK
At first glance, he has all the tools to be one of Twitter’s foremost viral bad boys. The only catch? He’s not even a real person. Well he is, but his name isn’t Taylor Welsh, and he’s actually a diabetic 28-year-old “aspiring influencer” who’s attempting to obtain a profitably large social media following of predominantly teen girls on a non-monetizable social media platform by impersonating a high school baseball stud online. Common man stuff. Guys being dudes.
Stealing the identity of a kid named Ethan, an anonymous man who goes by “Taylor Welsh” has been luring unsuspecting female victims into messaging and lusting after him for months now.
And yes, he’s also accepting compliments and advances as if he were legitimately a completely different, decade-younger person.
All of this, in and of itself, is pretty fucking weird and creepy. But it becomes especially bizarre when you realize that it’s more than just a tactic to “clout chase” and gain a bigger following by appealing to naive Nebraskan nursing majors.
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He also went as far as to create—and relentlessly promote—“his” Instagram account that’s made up entirely of stolen pictures from this Ethan gentleman. And he’s scoring compliments in those comments as well.
At best, “Taylor Welsh” is an extraordinarily creepy incel who desperately wants to feel what it’s like to receive positive female attention. At worst, he’s currently wearing the sunburnt skin of one of the horse girls who thought she was about to meet up with her Twitter crush. I don’t know. It’s probably harmless, but it’s semi unsettling to me that someone is out there doing shit like this. Probably report him as spam. Or don’t. My mind is too warped to even know what is and isn’t morally correct.