Man Who Carjacked A Pastor After Claiming He Is God Really Knows His Target Audience

AP – A western Pennsylvania man has been jailed on charges he stole a pastor’s car at gunpoint, claiming to be God in the process. Online court records don’t list an attorney for 29-year-old Joshua Mellott, of Breezewood, whose arrest was first reported Tuesday by the Altoona Mirror. Police say Mellott took a gun from that car and fired it through the window of another vehicle, before the pastor gave up his keys while Mellott brandished the gun.

Well that’s just about the smartest thing I’ve ever heard anybody do in my entire life. This isn’t just some idiot carjacker going around all willy-nilly and stealing whatever Honda 4-door he lays his eyes upon. Nope. This Joshua Mellott character is a fella who does his homework and knows exactly who he is going after. I’d love to see a man of God try to tell God himself that he’s not allowed to steal his car. And yeah, obviously Joshua Mellott isn’t really God, I get that. But I feel like when you’re a pastor, you can’t exactly run that risk of pissing off the big man upstairs. No pastor wants to be that guy who gets his chance to meet God in real life and ends up blowing his opportunity to join the clique all because he refused to believe it was actually Him. You tell Pastor Carl that you’re God, he has no other option but to believe you. So this is a heads up play here by all accounts. Obviously things didn’t really go according to planned in the end, but its the thought that matters. Criminals are scums of the earth. But if you’re gonna be a total scumball, at least put some effort into it. And that’s what Josh did. Give him 10 Hail Mary’s and 10 Our Father’s and maybe throw in 10 months in jail and we’ll call it even.