There have been a lot of dumb characters in the history of film and television. One name that comes to mind is Peter Quill from the Marvel cinematic universe. All that guy had to do was not wake up Thanos while they were getting the gauntlet off in Infinity War and we don’t even need an Endgame movie. I’m not complaining because I cannot fucking wait for Thursday, but you get my point.
Thrones Spoiler from last night alert (I don’t know why you clicked on this blog if you haven’t watched)
Well, I’m here to tell you there has never been a dumber movie or TV character than Jon Snow. Last night right at the end of the episode Dany goes to meet up with Jon to get some alone time before the white walkers come and kill everyone they’ve ever met. Just like Arya (gross) I thought they were just going to fuck one more time before chaos unfolded. Nope, Jon took it upon himself to tell Dany his real name, Aegon Targaryen and that his real father is Rhaegar. We all know that means Dany is his aunt and also not the rightful heir to the throne, literally the only thing she cares about in this world.
Let’s break this down in simpler terms shall we? So we’ve got a whole army of dead people coming to kill everyone that is alive. They greatly outnumber the amount of alive people that are left. They also have an ice dragon. Among the alive people is a woman who controls the dragons and is enormously powerful. So just minutes before that giant war you think that’s the best time to tell her she’s not the rightful heir to the Throne and that the guy she’s in love with and been banging this whole time is your nephew? WHAT!!!
I’m not a war expert here, but I think maybe you hold onto that secret until after the war. Dropping that bomb on Dany just like that just minutes before the white walker army arrives is just about the dumbest thing you could possibly do, next to killing her. Dany is going to be riding around on her dragon not thinking about how to kill the Night King, she’s going to be second guessing her whole life and what the fuck Jon just told her. All she cares about is the Throne. That’s it. You just ruined her dream, Jon, you fucking moron. If we made a pros and cons chart of telling her or not telling her there would not be one single pro. Not one. I mean I was stunned when he told her. Are you brain dead Jon? I mean you might have just lost the war just like that. The famous saying is “You know nothing Jon Snow” and that’s because he doesn’t have one brain cell to know anything. This is like if you told a quarterback right before the Super Bowl kicked off that his wife has been cheating on him and is leaving the family. Idiot!
P.S. Shout out to Dany for not even flinching at the fact she’s been having sex with her nephew. It’s all about the Throne, incest is so in, shout out Family Strokes.
Download and listen to the new episode of Game of Stools where they break down everything we watched last night