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Jordie Finally Gets A Tryout* With The Philadelphia Wings

Ever since I can remember, it has been my dream to be a professional lacrosse player. And I’ve known my whole life that these guys don’t make millions and millions of dollars. I didn’t want it for the money, I didn’t want it for the fame. I just wanted to be a professional lacrosse player because I love the game.

And just the other week, I had the opportunity to turn my dream into a reality when the Philadelphia Wings came calling and gave me a tryout. Now it wasn’t “officially” a tryout. They were calling it a “Media Clinic” where they invited a bunch of different Philly sports media personalities over to the Wells Fargo Center to learn how to play lacrosse. But c’mon. They know me. They know that I don’t need to learn the basics. So when I got the invite, I knew that this was unofficially my official tryout to finally make my hometown team.

How did it go? Well you tell me.

And that’s with a left knee that is still only around 80%. Just imagine what I’ll be looking like at the beginning of next season once I’ve had a full year to recover.

I really love the way this Wings team plays but they’ve just been having some issues with closing out games so far this season. All I’m saying is that if there’s anybody who can really push them over the hump and help them start stringing together some wins out there, they have my information.

P.S. – Big thanks to the Wings for putting on this event. And a quick shoutout to some of my future teammates who were there to make it all run smoothly. Blaze Riorden, Kevin Crowley, Matt Rambo, Frank Brown, Chris Collins. Just a group of A1 quality beauties right there.

P.P.S. – Before anybody else starts chirping me about my kidney pads, just shut up. 1) I packed on a couple of post-surgery lbs so the mediums don’t fit quite as well as they used to. And 2) I have to wear them up that high because I’m so goddamn short that I never get hit where they’re actually supposed to sit. Bastards.