I know what you’re thinking. I know what you expect. “Now you’re in NEWWWW YORRRRK…” You expect me to say that this city and the underground web of death and filth are the worst place on earth. You expect me to curse this man and wish the next train takes him.
Well I’m not gonna do…what you all think I’m gonna do…which is FLIP OUT. Nope. Not this time. Because this is the realest shit I’ve ever seen, man. As despicable and disgusting as this place is, theres also something undeniably different about this city. Theres plenty of other overcrowded shitty cities on this planet, but New York City is the ONLY place you’re gonna catch an asshole trying to stuff a 30 foot steel beam into a subway car like the Grinch jamming Cindy Lou Who’s tree up the chimney
I dunno how things go in other cities but round these parts if you can get your hands on scrap metal like that you’re caking it. You call up Two Brothers on the Island and bring all your copper and all your aluminum and you’re making that MONGO MONEY. When times are tough and things are tight and you know a couple guys on the job who can break you off some copper, you’re eating good that week. Now granted its usually a few PVC pipes or a coil of wire…not a 30 foot long I-Beam. But mongo life isnt always the most convenient, OK? You got yourself a hundred pound steel beam in Manhattan and you gotta get it out to the outer boroughs, guess what? You aint taking it in a Yellow Taxi. The subway cost $2.75 to ride whether you roll solo or whether you bring half a building with you. All it takes is a little bit of help.
And honestly thats the realest shit about this series of videos. The amount of help my guy gets is nothing short of inspiring. 3 videos, 1 transfer, and a dozen hands all worked together to bring us this epic series of human perseverance. Of persistence and ingenuity. Of really seriously truly inconveniencing a lot of people in order to make a few bucks on scrap metal. And not since 9/11 have I seen New Yorkers come together like this. Holding doors, guiding steel beams, helping carry the load. If you try to sell me candy bars or you break dance in my face or you preach my ears off and shove your hat in my face for a few bucks, you can go fuck yourself. But there’s something so patently ridiculous about lugging around a weight baring I-Beam on your back into a very compact tunnel that you have no choice but to respect it. Its one of those moments where you’d bump into this guy and rhetorically yell “What the fuck are you doing!” and when he answers “I’m trying to get this gigantic steel beam out to Brooklyn so I can sell it.” and you gotta just be like “Alright word, let me help you get this onto the L. Pivot. PIVOT!”
I aint giving up my seat for a little old lady. I’ll elbow a little girl in the face trying to get prime position on the train. Every man for himself, doesnt matter if you’re pregnant or handicapped or a senior citizen – you gotta fend for yourself. But this dude trying to lug a gigantic piece of metal? New Yorkers, UNITE! Somehow this idiotic bullshit perfectly embodies the best and the worst of this godforsaken city.