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Let’s rewind all the action in the sports world while realizing that the best part of Cam Newton’s game last night was his Charlotte Hornet cleats.

 

The games.

 

New Orleans 28, Carolina 10

You think I was joking? Look at Cam’s numbers last night.

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And they somehow felt worse than that. Overthrowing receivers, making poor choices, just an awful awful game from Cam. So much so that his owner basically died in his box midway through.



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Alright, say something nice about the Panthers and their organization.

 

Grown men are good at dressing up like children?

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The Defense is good at lucking into absurd interceptions?

They made Jimmy Graham headbutt the bench (this was actually in excitement after scoring a touchdown)

And Rob Ryan looked hungry basically all night. That’s about it. The Saints are now officially back in control of the NFC South. Which is essentially bragging about owning a tire fire. Yeah Saints! You control that big pile of burning rubber that will never go out. Good work!
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Intermission PSA from Jose Canseco.
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Don’t clean 4 loaded guns at the same time. Also remember to breathe and occasionally drink water since we’re now stating the bare minimum requirements to stay alive.
Florida State 42, Louisville 31
..
Oh shit, Florida State is maybe going to lose under Jameis!
..
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Butt Fumble!!!

 

 

LOL in your face idiot!

 

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The operative word above was MAYBE. Because Florida State did not lose. Why? Well Louisville stopped guarding people and tackling the opponent. Not a football coach but those seem important.

 

 

And then we had a fantastic collection of Sad Louisville fans. This game was half about Jameis and half about how many time ESPN can find someone about to commit suicide.

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Second Intermission – Sharp with the silky mitts and shootout winner.


 

 

 

Basketball! Yes there was basketball last night, no I will not go through every highlight, but here is what you should know.

 

NBA players still dress like dickheads.

 

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Lebron came home.

 

 

 

And STUNK his way to a Cavs loss. So overrated.

 

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Rovell snitched on a waterboy. No this is not an exaggeration. Such a narc.

 

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The Timberwolves had Vanilla Ice.

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And still couldn’t give away tickets or be bothered to even place them inside of a trash can.

 

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And Ballmer, well Ballmer did not disappoint. I laugh just looking at him.

 

 

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The question was “What do you want people to think of when they hear the name Clippers

 

The answer, HARDCORE

 

….

 

Harvard              Florida               Alabama            Michigan           Washington

 

USC                 Syracuse            Texas                Colorado            Ohio State