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Drake And Ronaldo Are Going For The Same Girl At An American Club. Whom Does She Pick?

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This is a debate I had with some friends over the weekend that has trickled into the office. Here’s the setting:

Drake and Cristiano Ronaldo are at a bar/club in America. They are both trying to pick up the same American girl. Whom does she pick?

So far, about 2/3 of people are saying Ronaldo. I think’s much closer than that, especially if the poll was limited to American girls. Let’s break it down with a Tale Of The Tape.

Cristiano Ronaldo

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Age: 34

Height: 6’2″

Profession: Soccer player

Net Worth: $450 Million

Twitter Followers: 77 Million

Instagram Followers: 155 Million

Accomplishments: 5 Ballon d’Or awards, 5 League Titles, Portugal’s all-time top international goalscorer, first player to reach 40 goals in a professional league in two consecutive seasons, holds the records for most official goals scored in the top five European leagues (414), the UEFA Champions League (121), the UEFA European Championship (29) and the FIFA Club World Cup (7), a bunch of other soccer stats I’m just reading off Wikipedia

The Case For Ronaldo: Ronaldo is one of the most famous athletes in the world, possibly the most famous. Soccer is the world’s biggest sport and Ronaldo is its biggest star. He’s also super rich with a ton of endorsement deals. And oh yeah, he’s just a great looking dude. Based on straight up looks, Ronaldo beats Drake for the vast majority of girls. He’s also richer and has more worldwide fame. His impact in America isn’t the same, but this girl knows who Ronaldo is for the sake of the hypothetical (although she’s not some huge soccer fan). But overall, being better looking and richer is huge points for Ronaldo backers.


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Age: 32

Height: 6’0″

Profession: Rapper

Net Worth: $140 Million

Twitter Followers: 38 Million

Instagram Followers: 54 Million

Accomplishments: 4 Grammys on 42 nomination, most charted songs (186) among solo artists in the history of the Billboard Hot 100, the most simultaneously charted Hot 100 songs in a single week (27), the most time on the Hot 100 (431 weeks) and the most Hot 100 debuts in a week (22), RIAA’s top certified singles artist, 12 million albums and 95 million singles sold globally

The Case For Drake: Drake is arguably the biggest male superstar in America. Certainly in the top 5 at absolute worst. You may not like him or his music, but you know who he is. He puts out more popular music than probably any artist in America. His lyrics consistently get quoted and become Instagram captions/tweets for millions of girls across America. His music has led to countless viral trends/memes/quotes. In My Feelings Challenge, YOLO, Hotline Bling video, Meek Mill beef, Pusha T beef, baby mama controversy, and more. He’s a vital part of American pop culture whether you like it or not.


Ronaldo is winning the Twitter poll easily. The office is a little more split. Personally, I think the answer is Drake.

In America, Drake is the way bigger star than Ronaldo. Girls LOVE Drake. They love his music and they love quoting him. What do you see more of? Girls listening to Drake or watching Ronaldo goal highlights? Also, getting with Drake gets you way more clout than getting with Ronaldo. Maybe he’ll mention you in a song! What’s a girl more likely to brag to her friends about? I think it’s 110% hooking up with Drake.

Finally, think about the situation at the club. If Drake starts singing to her, it’s game over. Is Ronaldo going to have a soccer ball with him and start doing cool tricks? I think not.

The Twitter poll is skewed because I have way more guys following me than girls : (

BUT, if I could limit the poll to 18-34 year-old American girls, I think Drake wins.

What do YOU think? Leave a comment below and subscribe to my channel.