STAY OFF THE WEEEEEEEEEED

Alright, not really, ’cause weed is awesome (most of the time), but for those of us who clearly can’t handle the devil’s lettuce…maybe just take it easy.

As a marijuana-induced heart attack survivor myself, I very much sympathize with this young man who doesn’t know what the fuck is goin’ on right now, and offer this bit of advice – do not call 911. You’re gonna be alright. Take a few deep breaths, house a few bottles of water, and if there’s a friendly Iowan in sight, get them to comfort you and take ya down a few notches. It’s alllllll gonna be okay. But if you’re lookin’ for advice from our pal Stephen A…