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Cowboys Fans Rushing AT&T Stadium To Get Into The Game Looks Like A Hellscape

I HATE these people. I hate all of them with every bone in my body. I can’t say I hope they die so I won’t but boy do I hope at least a few of them pulled a hamstring that will mildly inconvenience them for the rest of the day. They’re the same kind of people who pop up as soon as a plane starts boarding to stand in line then sit in a cramped seat. Sit at the bar closest to the gate until 5 minutes before the flight like a normal adult, you have an assigned seat you goddamn lunatic.

What’s that? Hang on, I’m being handed an urgent update. These are people who are trying to get standing room only, not people who have seats? And I already knew that when I started writing the blog but I really liked that airport comparison so I wanted to get it out there and now I’m making up this urgent update thing? Well then, egg on my face.

I don’t give a fuck if you have a seat or if you’re some maniac who bought endzone standing room, you’re a piece of shit if you do this. I mean that, a piece of shit. You’re gonna participate in this Jingle All the Way assfuck of a crowd to kinda see maybe a few blurs of a jersey at some point while you stand in a pit of gross people touching you all the time? Why not go watch at a water park if you want to be a scumbag? Sit at home, sit at a bar, hell sit in the fuckin parking lot if you wanted the game experience, but doing this is the lowest form of humanity. You couldn’t pay me a million dollars to do this to see anything and I truly mean that. I wouldn’t wait in line then rush a gate to see Jesus, let alone Dak Prescott.